Mujal / Elsewhere

texts and pictures by: Yegane Derya Türksever

picture order by: matarebeliblog

Ğ

I’m Ğ.
You cannot pronounce my name.
You even don’t know my name.
I wake up in the middle of the night and I eat carrots.
While I eat carrots, I listen to him leaning against the wall of the kitchen.
I realized that I was the same person despite going to wherever I could go.
The place where I am not in seems peaceful to me.
I’d like to go till the end of my life. I’d like to go through end of my life and consider.
Who is the bravest one?
Sometimes I drink soup.
Rarely milk.
I’m Ğ.
Does it make sense even if we change the places we live although we cannot change?
Continually carrots.

FROM MY DIARIES

24.10.2011

(…)

He said: “Get your bag packed. We’re going to elsewhere.”

Eventhough I didn’t even think of asking, he added: “But I won’t tell you where we’ll go. Actually as a native of this country, I’ve never been around there. I want all of you get surprised.”

I conceive that nothing is a surprise to me and naturally I receive everything with no restrictions whatsoever and yet unconditionally.

There were troubles that I couldn’t face so I couldn’t fix. Anyway, then a state of “skipping things and letting them to go” embraced me. Things that buffet me around and furthermore smooth my sharp points to force me to grow up. I don’t want to grow up. I don’t... I won’t…

(…)

Imagine a girl who is too young and too naive but yet so ripe. She said that she couldn’t understand desire of people on vanishing. We laughed aloud.

While we were talking about my story, we figured out that the real madness was “skipping things and letting them to go”. All the things I make is not plausible but explainable.

(…)

He told me: “Surprise!” He didn’t notice that he couldn’t surprise me.

(…)

20.12.2011

I followed him around once again being unconscious about our route. I was thinking if the things I follow around to obtain something new is the truth everbody search during their lives or the tickery that they believe in owing to feeling theirselves being soothed.

Probably I have nothing to do better than to go so that I was going.

(…)

Much later we got off the train at a very close point that I have learnt so later that is close to Russian border. While he said “Ok, we will walk a little.” with a peculiar light in his eyes, I realized that much more that “a little” expects to me but I had to get a grip on this irony.

(…)

-          Do you still think that you are in hell?

-          Well, first of all I thought that so but from now on I think that I’m in paradise.

-          Paradise? Good!

(…)

I said that he couldn’t surprise me but I was wrong this time. He surprised and this was the thing I had to get a grip on.